Bootcamp Mafia: Final Episode - The Demise Of The Unholy Trinity

With the transition of the studio from Columbus to Salem, debris has been cleared from the enrollment roster. The demise of the unholy trinity (kumar, zombie man and troll) is complete. Kumar was the last hold out and he finally fell by the wayside after one workout with cagefighter at the Salem location.
Finally, the hell of having to deal with the ash & trash of humanity is over.



The beauty of the Salem location is that it pre-screens potential clients and provides a training ground for the dedicated people who want to work hard and achieve great things. You see, fitness, nutrition, lifestyle and mindset are not about convenience. It's about dedication and commitment. If you base your selection criteria on convenience, then more than likely, you will sacrifice quality.  



With the saturation of fitness studios, gyms, trainers, exercise programs and diet centers in Columbus, many people just go where the closest place is and roll with it. Of course, there is always a price to pay when you do this.



The Salem location is further away (25 minutes from Columbus). It is not the convenient or easy pick. And I like it that way. Deal seekers, the lazy, the mentally weak, the undisciplined and those who want immediate satisfaction without the required work, will never come out to Salem. Some do, but they don't last long. And that is fine with me. No matter how much income that may sacrifice for me, I only want to train the dedicated and committed people who have the drive, desire, discipline and heart to go the distance and excel.

The training in Salem is far more challenging than other locations that I have trained people at. The main reasons are the environment and unparalleled focus of the training. So if you like to work hard and to be challenged to push yourself beyond your limits and comfort zone, the Salem location is worth checking out.
I offer a free trial workout for everyone, including previous clients, who want to see if it is right for them.

With the demise of the unholy trinity and related ash & trash clients, you can rest assured that training here will place you among a small, hardcore, dedicated group who have big goals and the desire to excel. If that sounds like something that you want to try, come try a free workout.

Eric
Dempsey's Resolution Fitness

Bootcamp Mafia Episode 5: The Return Of Kumar

Disclaimer: My bootcamp mafia episodes are for comedy, humor and entertainment only. All characters are purely fictional and exist only in my nightmares. No offense or hard feelings are ever intended. And as always, if you don't like it, simply go away. 

So this past month, things have been quiet, as the trio of cannibalistic humanoid underground dwellers known as Kumar, Troll and Zombie Man, disappeared off of the radar screen. Things returned to the normal, peaceful and happy environment until tonight. 

Then as usual, late and useless, Kumar burst upon the scene like the pus of a festering zit. Boom! He was back. Fortunately, he was alone. It wasn't so bad even though I was deeply saddened and distraught at his untimely return. 

The workout went fine and the return of Kumar was without fanfare. It just goes to show you that when you think things are looking up - BAM another torpedo hits the hull of the Bismark. 

I will keep you posted as developments unfold. Maybe without the trio of darkness, Kumar's negative energy can be dissipated by the cheer and goodwill of other more noble humans.   

Time will tell. Stay tuned for more updates.

Eric

Dempsey's Resolution Fitness

Bootcamp Mafia Episode 4: Dreams Don't Always Come True

Disclaimer: My bootcamp mafia episodes are for comedy, humor and entertainment only. All characters are purely fictional and exist only in my nightmares. No offense or hard feelings are ever intended. And as always, if you don't like it, disappear, like a wallet full of money, on payday. 

So I always had visions of training warriors and warrior princesses and the like. Hardcore people who stopped at nothing to attain their goals. Team oriented, loyal, hard working and dedicated to the mission and the team. Reality set in 7 years ago and I had to accept that I would really train common folk. I have trained many soldiers and their wives. I have trained people from all walks of life and numerous professions.

But the majority have been average jane and average joe of all makes and models. And that turned out fine as I always had soldiers and some athletes in the mix. I've always had a small elite clan of followers who made it worth going to work everyday. I truly enjoy my job. It is my passion  and has been for 30 odd years now. 

The tides have changed recently and a new era has arisen. I contemplate the term "curse" often now. I don't know what caused this dramatic shift but it is alarming to say the least. 

February is always a slow month for me. The January crowd has fallen by the wayside and those who linger on fade in February as life delivers it's body blow of reality to the masses. But there are always my small band of loyal die hards who never quit. And a new lot in the mix who never DIE!

People have been scattered to the four winds this week and most have not shown up for a variety of reasons. Then out of the abyss, comes the crew that I didn't expect to see. My favorite fictional characters from across the black hole, rear their ugly heads in unison and march forth to the sound of war drums. 

Kumar, Troll and Zombie Man. Like night stalkers, they encroach on my position. And of course, nobody else is around to witness my plight. A 45 minute session in hell and torment. Fortunately, it passes and they slither away to leave me broken and scarred. I'm burned out and stressed now. The fire of my passion dims with each blow of the curse. 

I will regroup and emerge victorious as I won't let the band of the curse bring me down. I will fight on.
Stay tuned for more as I'm sure disappointment and hell on earth are destined to follow. Till then....

Eric
Dempsey's Resolution Fitness

Bootcamp Mafia Episode 3: Enter Zombie Man

Disclaimer: Bootcamp Mafia episodes are for humor and entertainment only. No disrespect or bad stuff intended. If you don't like it, go away. Slit your wrists, get pissed and go jump off a bridge in other words.

So things have been fairly quiet at bootcamp lately. Kumar and troll sporadically showing up. The rest of the crew being lazy POS's and quitting for the most part. The Loyal Die Hard Legion members hanging tough - Jillian, Cage Fighter, and a couple others.

But then out of the blue, enters Zombie Man. I though he was an oxygen thief in the past and guess what? Yup still do! But his money is green and times are tough so here he is.

Now zombie man is a special kind of fu&*ed up. I was originally going to call him DSB (down syndrome boy), but you know how every one gets offended if you say a disability term. So he has the value of a zombie, so close enough. And he kind of walks and stalks around like a zombie after the warm up and first set of the workout.


Bootcamp class

So we have established his overall value to society as ZERO. Costing the world precious oxygen and resources. Anyway, I'd like to go on ranting about how awesome he is but -add troll and kumar into the shaker bottle and BOOM. Laughter erupts. I don't get paid enough to deal with this shit but anyways.







Enter Cage Fighter. She gets infuriated as she is working hard and then hears and sees the antics of zombie man and kumar discussing technique and instructing troll. Then cage fighter explodes with a rant heard round the world in an angry barbarian hoard voice. I can't contain my laughter and have to turn away. You had to be there. Needless to say it was a sight. Stayed tuned for more drama and action from the fat loss arena.



and now for some motivational music cause even the biggins need love too.



Eric
Dempsey's Resolution Fitness

Bootcamp Mafia Episode 2

So this week has started with some classics. The wounded troll said last night that I should just make him (the hated one) the trainer. I had visions of battle axes and blood spurting high. -oh just cause I was watching spartacus- not cause I would ever want to harm the special couple after a statement like that. As she walked out she caringly caressed his back. =GAG VOMIT AHHHHH

Cage fighter missed that one. She has been tending to a broken hammer toe.

The questions still remain:
who bought the f*$king dog?
Is there a new man of the week and is he an E-5 or an E-6?
So what is wrong with the serpent's tail exactly?

What ever happened to Patti? After she attended the last meditation class where Jillian somehow became mortally wounded, Patti fell off the cliff. She brought the music CD for the class. Wounded sperm whales being harpooned by pigmy japanese whalers. I couldn't play it obviously but I'll sell you the cd for a buck.



At least Terina showed up to shed a ray of sunshine on the topic. Snorting and talking of farting and such. You know- the usual.

Then the new girl asked: " do you hate me?" "Am I your worst client?" "Am I hopeless?" Holy hockey puck batman. I don't get paid enough. I should just make a smoothie bar and sit there listening to people tell me their woes while selling overpriced protein shakes.

The week is not over so I'll update if necessary. Comment and like -support the team.

Eric
Dempsey's Resolution Fitness